The Redcrosse Knight
Resident Satyagrahi
This past Sunday I watched as three talented individuals attempted suicide via stupid risks. What would the WWE be like without Shelton Benjamin, Jeff Hardy and The Undertaker?
Shelton Benjamin attempted a swanton onto the MITB participants outside of the ring. I say 'attempted' because his head and neck seemed to took the force of the blow. 'What will life be like for a parapalygic Shelton Benjamin?' I wondered. He'd probably get a column on WWE.com, appear at fundraisers, etc. before being quietly released years later. 'Poor Shelton' we'll all say.
Jeff Hardy leapt (leaped?) from a ladder in an attempt to crush his brothers skull. Intstead he compacted his lumbar vertebrae. A setback like this would surely send Jeff back into a downwardspiral featuring meth and back ally tricks (he was always the 'pretty' one). With his dog recently passing and his brother betraying him, Jeff would be out of friends, and out of work. 'Poor Jeff' some of us would say.
The Undertaker was not partaking in botched ladder stunts, but he is included by proxy. Since Wrestlemania 10, being in the ring with Shawn Michaels has created a dangerous work environment. His brand of one-up-man-ship entertainment, first illustrated in a Wrestlemania ladder match, motivates others to take stupid risks a la The Undertaker's leap over the top rope. None expected him to sit up after that head first landing on the outside mat. 'Poor Shawn Michaels' we wouldn't say.
WWE, please stop subjecting your employess to these hazardous work environments and bring back the one hour mat wrestling classics of the 30's so we can watch our favourite stars for years to come. If you still have viewers.
Shelton Benjamin attempted a swanton onto the MITB participants outside of the ring. I say 'attempted' because his head and neck seemed to took the force of the blow. 'What will life be like for a parapalygic Shelton Benjamin?' I wondered. He'd probably get a column on WWE.com, appear at fundraisers, etc. before being quietly released years later. 'Poor Shelton' we'll all say.
Jeff Hardy leapt (leaped?) from a ladder in an attempt to crush his brothers skull. Intstead he compacted his lumbar vertebrae. A setback like this would surely send Jeff back into a downwardspiral featuring meth and back ally tricks (he was always the 'pretty' one). With his dog recently passing and his brother betraying him, Jeff would be out of friends, and out of work. 'Poor Jeff' some of us would say.
The Undertaker was not partaking in botched ladder stunts, but he is included by proxy. Since Wrestlemania 10, being in the ring with Shawn Michaels has created a dangerous work environment. His brand of one-up-man-ship entertainment, first illustrated in a Wrestlemania ladder match, motivates others to take stupid risks a la The Undertaker's leap over the top rope. None expected him to sit up after that head first landing on the outside mat. 'Poor Shawn Michaels' we wouldn't say.
WWE, please stop subjecting your employess to these hazardous work environments and bring back the one hour mat wrestling classics of the 30's so we can watch our favourite stars for years to come. If you still have viewers.